Top Ten Vilians!

"Well Ken, we sure are impressed to see how you singlehandedly resuscitated an otherwise crumbling blogging community.

"Thank you noble fans. I too am astounded at my seemingly unlimited potential to summon within others powers they never dreamed of utilizing without my impetus.

"You are great. We appreciate all you do.

"Again, thank you noble fans."

WHAT IS INTERESTING IS THAT I NEVER HEARD THIS IN ALL YOUR POSTINGS AND RESPONSES TO MY AWESOME POST! All you did was criticize and whittle! That's it! What kind of noble fans are you?! THE WORST KIND!

Really though, if given another opportunity I would make a few changes to my Disney list. But I feel that the lists we compiled in so many ways reflect our personalities (with the placement of Peter Pan being indicative of one's propensity for adventure [suck that AJ!]!) and that my list especially reveals the inner ethos of my persona.
So, instead of revising, I'm going to continue this listing with my top ten villains of all time! Kelsi said she and Luke had discussed this and I felt I should continue my pattern of trend-setting and get a headstart on everyone.
Before I begin, I must explain this list. Especially with bad guys we have to define those characteristics by which we are assessing the performance of those we rank. For example, do we value those who are truly the most vicious and evil? Or those best able to carry out their diabolical intentions? Or those who we like the most? So many questions, and I was unable to isolate a single series of factors by which to determine my ranking, so I'll just say that this is a completely subjective valuation of who I felt were the best Disney villains in strengthening the story and projecting their dominance through their machinations. That said, let us tarry forth! ON WE GO!

10. Gaston. Ah yeah. The man's man turned bad man is definitely going to make my villain list. Gaston had some evil moments and his fight with the Beast was awesome, if only b/c you couldn't believe there was a human being tough enough to take on the bear/wolf/sasquatch that the Beast was, but for the most part Gaston makes the villain list for being such a strong addition to the story. His song about himself was awesome, his ability to incite a mob was eery, and his blind ambition to obtain the prettiest girl in all the province is intimidating. Gaston showed that a real hunter doesn't just go chasing after ducks and other defenseless fowl, he pursues with relentless absurdity anything that catches his attention and doesn't rest until he is satisfied. For those characteristics, Gaston begins my villain list.

9. Dr. Facilier, aka The Shadow Man. Another villain who, while creepy, is on the list for his ability to help drive the story. The Shadow Man proved to my soul that while Disney would let an otherwise promising project misfire and consign itself to 2D obscurity, they still knew how to conjure up an awesome bad guy. The song "I Got Friends On the Other Side" goes down as one of my most favorite Disney songs of all time, period. It may even top the list for best songs performed by a villain (being in close competition with Gaston's self-promoter). He managed to add spice to a film that I otherwise could not really enjoy and displayed a conflicting character seeking to balance being in control with being subjected to debts beyond his ability to repay. It was a great lesson on making deals with the devil. So thank you, Shadow Man, for helping me partially enjoy what should have been a more epic experience.

8. Monstro. Why whaling doesn't get a worse rap: too many peoplehave seen Pinocchio and think anything which is an enemy of Monstro is a friend of man. I watched a short clip of Monstro's awakening and realized that as a kid I truly couldn't imagine a terror more real than being trapped at sea with an unstoppable leviathan bent on my consumption. Monstro was so terrifying in part because he was portrayed to be so completely evil. You are shown no emotional side of Monstro, only the workings of a creature bent on destruction. He's bad. Very Bad. And Free Willies the world over have suffered a cruel rap at the hands of this villain's image.

7. Hades. You know we can't discuss villains without discussing how awesome James Woods was as the Lord of the Greek Underworld. He was entertaining, evil, and as all other good Disney villains are, hell-bent on conquest and domination. He got a bad rap from his all-powerful older brother and spent eons in the deep dark recesses of the world's abysmal spirit caverns. While many things in Hercules are sure to bother even the most elementary of Greek enthusiasts, you couldn't help but love Hades and his unfailing ability to make you crack a smile as he was cracking wise and plotting big. Also, the scene with the Titans where Hades informs them that Olympia is in the opposite direction of their terrorizing is priceless.

6. Queen Grimhilde. Vanity, thy name is Queen Grimhilde. This villain was brought to ruin by

her consuming desire for comparative beauty and it drove her to such undreamable heights as the attempted murder of the fairest, most innocent, and highest-pitched-voice damsel in the kingdom! It was tragic to watch the heights (literally) she went to in order to bring to pass her maniacal plans to fruition.

Also, Luke said he wished that Disney wouldn't have killed her off in her ugly period, but I think that was very poignantly deliberate. Moral lessons go to great lengths to help us visualize the effects of sin and vice, and I think Disney was going for the throat in demonstrating that the Evil Queen, while 2nd most beautiful, was 1st in the inner ugliness department, and she would die that way.

5. Jafar. I love how we've nearly universally acclaimed the racist and sexist stereotype Disney presented and lambasted in the character of Jafar. He has everything all the character traits that we despise: he looks like a snake, he views women as objects of man's desire and nothing more, he plots against the rightful (though bumbling) sovereign, and he taunts in puns (thanks for pointing that out Luke!). Not only that, but Jafar has one of the most entertaining sidekicks in the Disney pantheon, and their duo never seemed to quit dealing out domination and entertainment throughout the Aladdin sojourn.

4. Captain Hook. What is it with Disney villains and their obsession with some unobtainable quest? It seems that when Disney was founded Walt sat everyone down and said, "Listen, in every movie we make that is worth anything at all, I want you to insure that the villain is consumed with something antithetical to the cause of goodness. Don't make them dabblers, make them manics, and we will define villainy forever!" I don't know if he really said that, but he sure drove home the point with each of my preceding choices, and Captain Hook is no different. He lost a hand and he couldn't let it go (get it?!) and it took him from the position of a respected and wealthy plunderer to a scared ninny constantly on the run from an equally terrifying crocodile. I love the delivery of Captain Hook. He was the gentleman villain. While he wasn't afraid to break a promise or push the bounds of villain propriety, he still managed to stay clean shaven and well groomed. I also can't help but think that Disney wanted people to compare Cpt. Hook to the bungling French attempts to defeat the obvious English/American adventuring type represented by Peter Pan. WE KNOW THEY COULD NEVER TAKE US!

3. Cruella de Vil. While Cruella de Vil doesn't take home the prize for top villain in my list, I cannot deny her ubiquitous presence in the ethos of Disney villainy. She is by far the most recognized of the Disney villains, her tribute song is the most well known (it has its own jingle for crying out loud!), and her polar bear fur coat insures that she will continue to be hated as our society grows increasingly environmentally conscious (at least we tell ourselves we're more environmentally conscious). I wish I enjoyed 101 Dalmations more. I'm sure that if I did Cruella could have reached that infamous apex reserved for the best Disney villain.

2. Scar. Scar is second only to one in taking home the prize of best villain in my estimation. He perfectly personifies everything that we hate in villains: he's brilliant, ruthless (even to the point of killing his own brother, and attempting the lionicide of his nephew), he beats on women, subjects all to his will, and sings a piece featuring prominent Nazi and North Korea allegories throughout! Not only that, but Jeremy Irons delivered such a flawless performance that it was difficult at times to not root for Scar out of sheer love for his animating personality.

The moment when Scar digs his claws into Mufasa's desperate paws as he attempts to escape and whispers into his ears, "Long, live, the King" and then releases him to the wildebeast's stampede shall go down as one of the pinnacle moments of Disney film, and only a villain such as Scar voiced by a legend such as Jeremy Irons have pulled it off.

1. Maleficent. Bret told me when we were young that if he ever owned a boat or was captain of some ship he would name it Maleficent, and a casual glance at any Disney poster featuring this villain yields a persuasive justification. Maleficent demonstrated that true villainy, properly executed, can inspire unparalleled fear in the masses of children fortunate enough to purview a glimpse of true evil which will forever alter their perception of the world. Maleficent singlehandedly persuaded me to hate darkness, brambles, statues, crows, women magicians, dragons that weren't voiced by Sean Connery, and unholy flame, and those prejudices shall accompany me into my grave (wherein Maleficent shall have her final victory as my body is engulfed in darkness until the resurrection of our Lord commences for God's children). I cannot adequately describe what an effect she had on me, but to say that she defines the term villain is a gross understatement. When she emerges from her spell transformed into a dragon I admit that I still get just a bit squeemish (though I'm totally ready to rock on and take her on in whatever form of heroism such a feat entails).

I also love that Maleficent was ultimately defeated by the forces of righteousness and truth (with its obvious Christian overtones) and that while she was in her most absolutely abominable form.

SO THERE! Again I am the trend-setter! Let's see your responses to that!